Aditya, the overachieving kid

I ran into Aditya, the overachieving son of my friend Venkat Sivaraman as I was getting out of high school.

My son was in detention and I was "summoned" by the principal to show up. Venkat puts all his soul into his kids' education and Aditya did not disappoint. He is a star student, is a member every academic club and all teachers love him, most of the other kids think he is annoying.

Venkat hopes he will get his PhD(s), be a star scientest and end up as the science adviser to the president of the United States.

My son Alakshiyan is the same class as Aditya. Getting into trouble is his second nature, getting into trouble is his first nature as well. He is close to getting his kung-fu black belt and is one of the stars of the running team. I just want him to get into college and somehow manage to get out with a diploma. He wants to major in political science and get into politics, public service or law.

All his American friends know him as Al, his north Indian friends know him as Aaloo. He wants to be popular among his hispanic friends too (the fastest growing racial group, good for politics) and is floating around the name Alejandro. I have no idea how is going to get into college but he has already chosen the name Alexander the great as his Greek sorority name.

Politics seems to be the only place where he can fit in and I can't say I am very proud of him.

As I walked out of the principal's office with my head down, Aditya stopped to say hello. I asked him what he is up to these days and soon realized what an idiot I was for talking to him.

"You are in the astronomy club, right ?" I asked.

"Astronomy, astrophysics, anthropology, animal behavior, archeology....." and he we went on listing all his club memberships in alphabetical order.

I tried to stop him before he lost his breath but he continued.

"Medieval litreature, Mexican history, Marine biology...." he would not stop.

I just sat on the bench waiting for him to finish.

"Taxonomy, taxidermy, taxology, taxicology......" the list continued and I stopped him rather rudely.

"I am not as smart as you are, but "taxicology" ? That's not a real subject, right ? Are you just messing around ?"

Aditya looked puzzled and annoyed at the same time. "Just because you have not heard of it Mr Amar, it does not mean it does not exist. I running late, please google it".

Everything I ever learned all my life would fit in a floppy disk so I did not want to argue with a super geek like Aditya. Just wanting to leave the conversation on a polite note, I asked "What are you doing this weekend".

"Advanced calculus, at the Super-Duper Advanced Math Academy", he said as he started walking away.

"Oh, you are in advanced calculus class ?" I asked, obviously thrilled at hearing the name of a subject I have vaguely heard of before.

"Don't be silly", he replied. "I teach calculus there".

I just could not believe what I heard. When Alakshiyan got home, I screamed at him for not being part of any of these clubs. He did not pay much attention to me, took a few dollars from me and left for track practice. I opened up my laptop and looked up taxicology.

To my surprise, nothing showed up. I felt a little better about myself but was upset with Aditya for treating me this way. "Aditya is not a perfect human being", I thought to myself "He is just a liar".

Luckily, the same evening I saw Aditya at the grocery store with his dad. They were playing blindfold chess while walking the aisles. I asked Aditya about taxicology. "you were messing with me, right ?" I said. "I can't find it on google".

"I am sorry Mr Amar, you will be able to search it now. I just uploaded it to google." he said as he switched off his iphone. "It is a brand new subject that explores the ecological impact of taxicabs and taxi drivers in New York city. I am working with MIT's aeronautics department on designing an airtaxi that uses no fuel."

Just to make sure, I went to MIT's website using my blackberry from my car and found out that all Aditya said were true.

The following day I got a call from my son's high school. My son was in detention again. As I was waiting my turn in the principal's office, the man next to me started a conversation.

"Is your son in kungfu team ?" he said, "He is also a runner, right ? He is pretty fast."

"Yes" I said proudly. It is not very often I hear good things about him at school. "He wants to grow up and be in public service" I added.

Right then the principal opened his office door and said "Mr Amar, your son is in detention today. I will tell you why" nodding his head unapprovingly.

"He punched his classmate Aditya on the face, stole his lunch money and ran away".

As I walked into the principal's room, I thought to myself "Why doesn't this surprise me ?"

College admission: An Indian dad's perspective

"Aditya is going to Columbia" my wife said as she got off the phone.

Columbia ? He is not into marijuana farming, right ? I joked.

She did not find my comment funny. She replied annoyingly, "Columbia university" and added "the ivy league school in New York".

I had known Venkat Sivaraman for several years. Aditya is his overachieving son who just graduated from high school. He has a daughter in 10th grade. Venkat always took his kids' education very seriously. Both of his kids took the SAT as early as in their sixth grade and scored better than a lot of high school kids. Aditya was the debate team captain and was a member of a number of academic clubs in high school. His sister Anusuya was no slouch either. She had her share of some high profile brainy club memberships too and I always thought she was the smarter one.

"How is Venkat feeling ? Did you talk to him ?" I asked.

"I don't know, I just talked to Lakshmi and she did not elaborate much. Venkat is your friend, why don't you talk to him. He would like that. By the way, Aditya's dorm room is already available and they are taking him to New York tomorrow".

I called Venkat right away. I knew this was going to be a long conversation. Venkat's son getting admitted to Columbia: that's unbelievable. Venkat was busy and did not pick up the phone but I left him a voice mail asking him to call me back. May be he has no time or in the mood to talk to people, I thought to myself. He is probably busy packing his minivan.

A week went by and Venkat did not call me back. In the meantime, I just typed a nice long email to him.

Venkat called me that Saturday and asked me if I can join them for lunch and apologized for not calling me back sooner. As Lakshmi opened the door she lowered her voice and said "Venkat is still recovering. All the way from New York he was talking about all the classes he took Aditya to including the marathon SAT prep course he took this year. I felt like jumping out of the car, tired of hearing the same story for over ten hours".

Venkat and Aditya were very close. He and Lakshmi spent all their time and energy on their kids' education, shuttling them from class to class ever since I can remember. They would not even waste weekends, track-outs and summer vacations. All that "spare" time was spent on research, essay writing, kumon and SAT. Even during dinner time, the family would play number games and word games for fun. Simply put, Venkat never had a minute for himself.

As I entered the living room, Venkat was sitting on the couch with an expressionless face and a bottle of beer. I have never seen him drink alcohol, I guess he never had any time to.

"Columbia university ?" I started the conversation slowly. "I hear he got a full scholarship too. You must be tired from that long trip. How has the past couple of days been, with just the three of you now in the house ?"

"Now Anysuya is all I can think of" Venkat said dryly. "She is all I got. She will be out for college in two years. Let's see how it goes".

I started, "She will do just fine, just fine"..... and Venkat interrupted me politely with a show of his hand and said "I read your email".

"That was the sweetest email anyone ever sent me. It was like you were reading my mind", Venkat said as he patted my shoulder. "I read it again and again. You are the only one that understands me, not even my own wife could look at it from my perspective".

"It is all right Venkat, I have known you for a while. I know exactly how you would have felt about your son going to college" I said sympathetically.

"All the good times I spent with Aditya, all the classes, coaching, late night kumon parties, I still can't believe that moron did not make it to Harvard. It is just too depressing. When have you seen me drink beer, during the day ?" Venkat said while sobbing uncontrollably.

"Anusuya is all you got now Venkat" I said. "I know for sure that she is the smarter of the two. She will make you proud. Now get yourselves together and let's have lunch. You know where to find me if you need a shoulder to cry on".

I hate seeing Venkat like this. Deep inside my heart I know that Anusuya will make him proud in two years but the scars left in him by Aditya will take a long time to heal.